reblogged 2 hours ago
21 Aug 2014 32,143 notes
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21 Aug 2014 355 notes

mshoneysucklepink:

pellegrini71:

Rob Pattinson Takes on ALS’s Ice Bucket Challenge

This one was fucking hilarious.

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reblogged 3 hours ago
21 Aug 2014 249,128 notes

towongfoo:

If I dont respond to your insult it means what i wanted to say was too mean and I decided to let you live

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reblogged 3 hours ago
21 Aug 2014 54,313 notes
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reblogged 4 hours ago
21 Aug 2014 99,103 notes
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reblogged 4 hours ago
20 Aug 2014 206,577 notes

ashtonsanders97:

221bisthenumberforme:

squidyword:

i hate america i’m moving to hawaii

should someone say something

Nah

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reblogged 4 hours ago
20 Aug 2014 8,444 notes

twhiddlestom:

Benedict Cumberbatch - Filmography (insp)

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reblogged 1 day ago
20 Aug 2014 45,645 notes

Celebrities taking part in the ice bucket challenge to raise awareness for ALS.

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reblogged 1 day ago
20 Aug 2014 265,976 notes

barakatjack:

thefaceshekeepsinajarbythedoor:

things i need to do:

  • clean my room
  • get a college degree
  • learn how to have healthy relationships
things i want to do:
  • play with puppies and kittens
  • find someone cute to cuddle and make out with
  • drive to the ocean
things i actually am doing:
  • taking subpar selfies
  • running a semi successful blog
  • listening to sad songs and watching too much netflix
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reblogged 1 day ago
20 Aug 2014 32,269 notes

Always 12%.

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reblogged 1 day ago
20 Aug 2014 126,272 notes

trippiest:

what a beautiful day to not be in high school

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reblogged 1 day ago
20 Aug 2014 186,298 notes
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20 Aug 2014 507 notes

extruhterrestrial:

  1. put in headphones
  2. put a playlist on shuffle
  3. lay face down in bed
  4. sing loudly into mattress or pillow
  5. sing as many random songs as it takes for you to laugh at yourself for singing to your mattress / pillow.

repeat steps 1-5 whenever you get bad.

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reblogged 1 day ago
20 Aug 2014 281 notes
michael in roosterteeth accepts the ice bucket challenge
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reblogged 1 day ago
20 Aug 2014 183,220 notes

ofgeography:

so here’s a fun story about this movie. guess who loves this movie? me! i do! i love this movie. i love this movie so much that when i was in the 7th grade and i saw “first wives club 2” on pay per view i was like: HELL YEAH!! FIRST WIVES CLUB TWO!! NO ONE TOLD ME THERE WAS A SEQUEL!!!

here’s the synopsis for first wives club 2:

disgruntled first wives take their ex-husbands’ new lovers under their wing.

sounds great, right? awesome viewing material for a precocious 11-year-old.

so i buy this movie, and like, three minutes into it i’m starting to feel suspicious?? like it’s really low quality and my girls are nowhere in sight?? how come none of the first wives are the same?? how come they’re alone in a bedroom with mood lighting?? why is she taking off her shirt?? why are they both taking off their shirts?? WHY ARE THEY—

here’s what i did not know about first wives club 2:

  • it is a lesbian porno of no relation to the beloved 1996 classic.

so of course i, horrified that i’ve accidentally bought porn on my family’s account (and in that state of panic that kids work themselves into whenever anything regarding sex is mentioned), quickly shut off the TV and go upstairs and watch an episode of veggie tales to like, cleanse my soul and apologize to jesus, and that’s that.

EXCEPT, OF COURSE:

  • you have to pay for pay per view.

so the end of the month comes and i have completely put this incident out of my mind, haha, i accidentally bought porn, how funny, TELL NO ONE. right? and i’m sitting at a nice dinner with my mother, my stepfather, and my very religious aunt deb, and we’re just talking about farm things, whatever, when suddenly my mother puts her fork down and says, “okay, there’s something we need to discuss. as a family.”

  • AS A FAMILY.

and i’m like, running through a list of people i know who could conceivably be dead, and fantasizing about my mother announcing that she’s going to buy me My Own Computer Just Because U Earned It Kiddo, and she pulls out a piece of paper that says DIRECTV across the top. and i’m like: OH NO.

"i received the tv bill today," my mother said, and i was like, shoveling potatoes into my mouth as fast as i could because i knew that when i went to PORN PRISON they weren’t going to feed me this kind of quality starch. "does anybody want to tell me who purchased the pornography?"

as a reminder, a quick table survey:

  • my mother, surprised and disappointed by the porn bill (innocent)
  • my stepfather, a grumbly old cowboy who just wants to sing along to kenny chesney and watch the hunt for red october (innocent)
  • my aunt deb, a super religious catholic whose best friend is a nun named Sister Placid (innocent)
  • me, the 11-year-old with a mouthful of potatoes who definitely purchased the lesbian pornography

silence.

my mother said, “i’m not going to ask again.”

silence.

my aunt looked at my stepdad. my stepdad looked at my aunt. NOBODY LOOKED AT ME, THE 11-YEAR-OLD WITH A MOUTHFUL OF POTATOES WHO DEFINITELY PURCHASED THE LESBIAN PORNOGRAPHY.

my mother shook her head and put the bill down. “this was incredibly inappropriate,” she said. “skip, deb, whoever. buy that shit on your own time. i’m not paying for it. what if molly had seen it?”

  • WHAT IF MOLLY HAD SEEN IT?

"don’t expose my kid to that crap."

  • DON’T
  • EXPOSE
  • MY KID
  • TO THAT CRAP

"if you want to watch porn, fine, but do it in private and don’t expect me to pay for it. i can’t believe one of you did that in the living room."

  • I CAN’T BELIEVE ONE OF YOU DID THAT
  • IN THE LIVING ROOM

but molly, why didn’t you own up to it and explain that it was an accident?

  • are you fucking kidding
  • i did not want to go to porn prison

the fun conclusion to this story is that i never owned up to it, which means that there are 3 people in the world who have not solved the mystery of the lesbian porn. a quick survey:

  • my mother, who lives every day wondering whose porn she paid for
  • my stepfather, who probably wishes he knew less about his wife’s sister’s porn preferences
  • my aunt, who probably wishes she knew less about her sister’s husband’s porn preferences

but molly, why don’t you own up to it now, with the safety of time and distance and the knowledge that porn prison isn’t real?

  • are you fucking kidding
  • this is the best thing i’ve ever done
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